Yesterday I woke up with a pain in my chest and a difficult to describe dizziness. It was as if the frequency of your brainwaves were amped up and down suddenly and the senses registered the phenomena: tinnitus became more acute, the body shuddered, and the visual field would lose realism for a fraction of a second.
As I describe this state I realize how difficult it is to report on inner sensation, but as I was feeling miserable I deliberately meditated a lot so that I would disassociate myself from the feeling of sickness, and soon enough I was observing the phenomena with more curiosity than discomfort.
I reduced my activities to what was most essential for the day: host a breakfast with my uncle, answer blank.page emails, and pick up a suit for a wedding I will attend this weekend. The rest of the time was spent sleeping or in meditation (or an intermediate of both).
Today I feel in much better shape, to the point I was thinking of going to yoga in the morning. I was paining about the decision: if I go and I feel sick it’ll be plenty of discomfort, but it could also go the other way: I could go and feel great afterwards, lessening the burden of this sickness.
As I was listening to the fragments of reason quarrel if this was a good idea or not, my body raised its hands and looked up towards the ceiling. Then my trunk folded and my hands tried reaching the ground. Though my cough and chest pains are almost gone, my body reeled with all kinds of pains and I knew yoga would not be a good idea this morning.
To which I pleased.
Now I can get to work.
Written with blank.page